Telling guests where you're registered: tacky or a time-saver?Is it OK to use your wedding invitations to let guests know where you’re registered?
Should you use your wedding invitation to let your guests know where you’ve registered for gifts?
Emily Post, the etiquette expert, says there should never be a mention of gifts or gift registries or even "no gifts please" in a wedding invitation or any of its enclosures.
Yet, today many brides include where they are registered with their invitations and many wedding guests find it saves them time.
So, if you include a couple of lines, such as “Registered at Macys and Bed, Bath & Beyond,” next to the map on your wedding invitation, are you being tacky or helpful?
I posed this question on Facebook and received dozens of responses from female friends around the country. Most who responded said they liked knowing where brides were registered and didn’t mind receiving that info with their wedding invitations — with some exceptions.
Here are some of their responses.
• Carol Zuegner: I find it helpful. I usually see it on the card with maps/info about reception/hotels etc. I guess it also could appear on the wedding website. Does Emily P. say anything about wedding websites?
• Suzanne Nadeau-Roach: Tacky. I’d rather be snoopy to see what the new couple needs/wants... or give money.
• Rachel Niceswanger Parsley: Helpful. So many couples these days live together before marriage or have well-established homes that they already are combining. When in doubt give a gift card… or the couple might prefer money for a down payment on a house or towards their honeymoon.
• Bridget Davis: I went to a wedding about 15 years ago where the couple was uber cool and only registered at the hippest stores in their city. We figured out where they were registered, through a family member, I think, and two napkin rings (or something similar) was what fit into our gift budget. The marriage was over before the honeymoon.
• Kathleen Shea Aregood: Agree with usefulness of registries, but the grabbiness/materialism of current wedding/shower ambience I find quite dismaying. I’m the “barefoot in the park” generation.
• Mary Schwab: I appreciate registries. They’re especially helpful when the registry is online and one can have the gift shipped to the bride.
• Tami Carmichael: This may be generational. I like it and find it very helpful. My mom thinks it is tacky and materialistic.
• Randi Roerick: I think the requests to pay for the honeymoon are weird. I’ll take a good old regular registry though!
• Ann Wolff (a 1960s-era bride): Tacky but practical. Perhaps I would not have received 12 salad bowls if there had been a list.